Written by Ashley K. (Keep her in your prayers as she eagerly anticipates the birth of her 3rd son soon -- she's 40 weeks and still writing and encouraging. What an inspiration!)
“She (the wife) brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.”
What happens when your husband comes home in a terrible mood? Think about it. How do you respond to him? Do you ignore him and carry on with what you were doing? Do you lend a listening ear and try to help him work through his problem?
Now, what happens when you come home in a terrible mood? In my household, if I walk through that door with a frown on my face, each family member runs and hides. My husband’s compassion has its limits. Sometimes, I just want to be mad and it’s in everyone’s best interest to avoid me.
More often than not, when my husband comes home and something is bothering him, I pester him until we work out a solution. I hurt when he hurts. “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” (Ephesians 5:31)
His problems are my problems. Cheering my husband up after coming home from a bad day at work is part of my job. Ignoring the problem or pretending not to notice that something is upsetting him is not going to make anything better. Women are nurturing and compassionate by nature, but we often direct that solely at our children. We can’t neglect our husbands. They require the same compassion.
The mood in the household depends mainly on us. If Mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy. Like I said before, my family runs and hides if I’m in a bad mood. Because women typically have a stronger emotional awareness, it is our job to do the best we can to have a positive attitude. I’m not saying that because we are wives that we are required to put up and shut up. What I am saying is, why would we make an effort to have a bad attitude when we know that it will negatively affect our family?
We are in charge of achieving a good mood or bad mood in our household. That is a HUGE responsibility that we shouldn’t take lightly. I will never forget a line from the movie “My Big Fat Greek Wedding.” The Mom and the daughter are discussing the Father and his attitude. The daughter, Toula, says, “Dad is stubborn...the man is the head of the house!” Her Mother smiles and responds, “Toula, the man is the head, but the woman is the neck. And she can turn the head any way she wants.”
Isn’t it the truth? If we sleep on our neck wrong and get a cramp it limits the motion of our head in the morning. If we get a black eye or bloody nose, our neck still functions fine. We are the neck! When I am sick, the laundry piles up, the kids end up in outfits not meant to be seen by the light of day, and my husband looks like he got hit by a truck.
When my husband is sick, I kick it into high gear. I bring him meals in bed, I am quick to apply the peppermint oil and he never misses a dose of medicine. I’m not disrespecting my husband at all, because believe me, that man takes really good care of me. I’m simply illustrating how important it is for us to take care of everyone in our family because we are equipped for the task.
Ultimately, our husbands are the head of the household, but we have such a profound influence over them and we need to make an effort to ensure that it’s a positive one. “But I want you to realize that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the woman is man...” (1 Corinthians 11:3)
Go ahead, baby your husband when he sick, give him a back rub without him asking for it when he gets home from work, bake his favorite cookies, stop pretending to have a “headache”! There is power in being a supportive wife. Go love on your husband today and let him know that you are on his side.