Read II Corinthians 12:1-9
Written by Alyssa at Resolved2Worship (borrowed with permission)
Mothers' Day has come and gone once again. I cannot express how much I love these children God has given me. Each one is so unique, such a completely different little package of His creativity and wonderment. Each one is a reflection of God in a different way. Each one is a piece of me and holds an equal piece of my heart.
Today my hair is full of the sand because of joining in the kids' sand fight wasn't an option, it was an impulse I could not restrain. Why as moms do we so often watch and not join in? We miss out and so do our kids.
There is a wonderful element of relaxation that comes with the ocean breeze and view, but mentally, I am a full time lifeguard - there is nothing really relaxing about that occupation. That's ok. . .
Because there is something spectacular about it. I watch them, one then the other, then the next and back around again. Every other minute or so my voice calls out, "Where is . . . ?" And someone will answer typically about the same time my eyes spot that little blonde headed child of mine.
I see their expressions, their mannerisms, their fears, their passion, their exploration. I see them living life. I am living it with them. Right now I am.
Right now doesn't last forever. It's fleeting. Hauling wagons and strollers and sand equipment, towels for an army, fishing gear, goggles, skim boards, boogie boards, beach umbrella, chairs, snacks, drinks - my pregnant self, now sore leg muscles from the work out as I type - one day it won't be. This time is not forever.
That's why - beside the fact that my kids don't need it - that's why there isn't any reason, need, or benefit in frustration, impatience, or short-temper. Life is too short for that. I want to stay calm and carry on. Not just simply carry on for the sake of carrying on. I want to demand that I take the second to notice the random hair that flaps in the face of the little beauty that is walking and dragging her sand toys behind her. I must demand of myself that I take heed of the little boy that is calling me to watch him fling himself wildly into the waves for the hundredth time. . .
I must demand of myself that I will join in the sand fight and not just watch or snap pictures.
To get myself out of the beach chair and dig in the sand, get covered from scalp to toe with sand, and wash up the thirty plus stinky crabs after crab hunts. Things that aren't necessary, but give me a way to live life with them shoulder to shoulder.
There is nothing like this. There is nothing like motherhood lived out - eyes looking at them at their level and seeing things as they see them. It's like being a child again, but knowing this time around, there is wonderful purpose behind it!
I saw a quote on a painted sign while shopping. It read, "Remember to Play."
The quote wasn't spiritual in nature, maybe not so profound to some or maybe shallow, silly, out of balance to others. But it's for me this week. It's for me at this time in my life.
May motherhood never be merely defined by our chores, or duties, our responsibilities, our discipline, our fears, our failures, our schooling choices, our rules, our regulations, our busy-moving about, or in something so crazy as the amount of children our body might happen to produce, or not produce. . .
Let it be defined by the passion we pour into discovering who are children are. Let it be defined by the willingness we have to be where they are, do what they are doing, love what they are loving. Let it be defined by the knowing and comprehending of the undeserved blessing we have in just being by their side.
How can I know how to do this motherhood thing?
By understanding how my Heavenly Father views and sees me. . . and by His grace alone, strength alone, "Not by might, nor by power, but by My Spirit says the Lord," - pouring out that same love He bestows upon me, on the children I have been given.
I need Him. I need God. He is the only way to stay calm and carry on. He is why I see motherhood as I do. It is all Him. I want Him to be the ultimate defining point of my call to motherhood.
Father, show me how to reach out to the children You've given us. Give me eyes to see what Your desire for motherhood is to look like for me, not what it is for someone else, but for me. Give me patience like You. Give me calm from You.
Remind me to play!
~ A. Ann